Thanks Universe (bock, bock)

I was having a pretty good day when I wrote my Things on Tuesday.  Work wife had brought pretzels, and I was able to find Stacey's pulse (I didn't inspect her belly-button or toes, though: I trusted her).  The day just got long.  And difficult.  We have days like that, and I'm okay with it.  I just had one difficult situation arise after another.  I was equal to them–it's not like I got yelled at or anything–but I was drained by the time I left. 

I hadn't eaten all day, so I figured I'd pick-up a sandwich that should truly be illegal.  I mean, what could be more damaging than a big fried fish sandwich? WAIT FOR IT! TWO giant fried fish (sic) patties.  With cheese.  And some sort of tartar sauce created by Ortho.  Despite the dubious provenance of the "fish" (I think of the three-eyed Simpsons fish), and the doubtless worse-for-you-than-HFCS sauce, there's something soul-assuaging about the Deep Sea Double sandwich.  So I got one.  Driving home, I flipped on the radio, and the "Classic Hits" station was playing Elton John's "Someone Saved My Life Tonight," which I've always loved.  Then I saw a truck from Martz Associates. 

I just grinned, and I knew I'd be okay.

I've written about it before, but I'm a geek for the movie "Hamlet 2."  Reviews were mixed–some found it hilarious and sweet, others not so much–but this movie never fails to crack me up.  I like the characters, the story, and I love the staging of the eponymous play, "Hamlet 2," a musical so dreadful, that it makes "Springtime for Hitler" look like "West Side Story." Anyway, I love the movie.

Steve Coogan's protagonist is named Dana Marschz, which is pronounced roughly "Martz." The play's music is provided by the Greater Tucson Gay Men's Chorus.  The song they sing in the play?

Yup.  "Someone Saved My Life Tonight."

I felt better at once.

I'd had a weird dream last night, too, so my brain might have been a little stunned.  There was a coral snake in my bed (in my dream), plus another coral snake and a scarlet king snake in the kitchen.  Very odd.  I didn't get bitten, thank Hypnos.  Coral snakes are the antithesis of the infinite python, Humanity, I wrote about last night.  They're small, thin snakes, brightly colored and pretty hard to stumble upon by accident.  They're also extremely poisonous, if you do manage to get yourself bitten.  They are found in Florida.  However, they are typically not found in even the messiest bachelor apartment.


In case you're wondering how to rid your apartment of unwanted coral snake infestation, the solution is simple: just open the front door, and get out of the way.  They'll go stampeding, or whatever the slithering equivalent of stampeding is, out the door.  Hooray! Problem solved.  Where are the nice X-Files dreams when I need them?

As I enjoyed my double deathfish sandwich, I perused the business section of The, which had a hilarious article about the FCC ruling that KFC could no longer mention its products as food.  Hah.  Plus, it contained this chart, which made me snort a little "tartar sauce" 😉 up into my nose:

The bit about Stouffer's being banned from showing people "satisfied with his or her life choices after ingesting a Stouffer's frozen dinner" got me. 

Anyway, I survived.  I made it home, finally.  I nom-cubed my double deathfish sandwich, laughed at the Onion story, selected one of my favorite relaxing cd's, and drifted off to my quiet place.

My Freshman year at Furman, I drove up Caesar's Head mountain a couple dozen times.  Yeah, I should've been studying, but to a kid who grew up in flat, hot Florida, the whole "mountain" thing, combined with the fiery autumn foliage, just blew my mind.  There was a restricted area I'd hike to, and a small outcropping beneath a larger cliff.  I'd sit there and watch the sun set behind the mountains to the west, and then one by one, I could see the little towns light up toward the south.  I felt at peace there. 

In many ways, the journey from back then to right now was as harrowing and dangerous–as beautiful and exciting–as the drive up and down Caesar's Head Mountain.  When I get stressed, it's all too easy to miss the magic in the world.  My head was about to explode this afternoon.  Whether it was pure coincidence or the Universe tipping me a reassuring wink, or even the result of some inevitable mathematical equation, I saw that truck while hearing that song.  And that made a world of difference.

Now, POUF, my Tuesday stress has evaporated.  In 15 hours, it will be my weekend.  I'm off to sleep now, and hopefully, there won't be any coral snakes in my bed.  I have ten fingers, ten toes, one navel, a steady pulse, and a happily unexploded head. 

Thanks Universe, bock-bock.  

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11 Responses to “Thanks Universe (bock, bock)”

  1. but to a kid who grew up in flat, hot Florida, the whole "mountain"
    thing, combined with the fiery autumn foliage, just blew my mind. I did get the point of your post, and it was (as always) beautifully poignant but honey, those are HILLS. [Sorry. 😦 I just had to mention it. I'm having a lot of trouble keeping my mouth shut these days, so I hope you're not too offended.]If it helps though… I agree that Sunsets solve SOOOOOO many problems. As do 'those' trucks and 'those' songs. I wholeheartedly agree. And I would gladly loan you Parsley… she LOVES to hunt snakes. It's like her whole life purpose is evident right then and there, when she's chasing those d*mn things.If only it were that easy. 😉

  2. I apologize for my mountain naivety, but when the highest point in your home county was a trash mound at the dump, the lesser Blue Ridge might have well been the Alps. 😉 (I'm not offended, btw, and you not keeping your mouth shut is one of the reasons I love you, GB)
    Thanks for the offer of Parsley. I may well co-opt her services if I have more snake dreams, although I'm sure Ana-Sofia Vargas would happily annoy the snake into submission. Wind would just ignore the snake elegantly until it felt bad about itself and left.

  3. Yes, but beware, Parsley has gas… LOL

  4. I'm not afraid. So do I. 😀

  5. Ha – maybe that coral snake wanted some fish sandwich. Snakes have tons of symbolism (and no Freudian mind in the gutter please), you should look that up in dream mythology! (Especially coral snakes)!

  6. I first heard "Someone save my life tonight" 10 years ago in university. I used to listen to it on repeat repeatedly… even though I never figured out what the song was about.

  7. I will ruminate on this post next time my job starts making my head pressure reach lethal levels…which it will do the next time I walk in the door! :)I love the Universe. It's a big ol' cuddly place. It's always plopping little treasures in our way, we just have to open our eyes and our souls to find them.(and I have to hear the bad things and be sad for a moment and then let that go)Ah…..philosophosophy. Mountains or hills, that autumn picture rocks! 😀

  8. I think I know where the coral snakes came from. I'd looked at an online thing called The World's Most Colorful Snakes that day. The coral and the scarlet king were both on there. The symbolism is fairly apt as well, though. Maybe it's both.

  9. I'm not saying it was necessarily designed that I saw those things, but it would be astronomical odds against that coincidence, especially when I rarely listen to that station. Here's to plenty of happy Universe ploppings in our paths. 🙂

  10. Universe Ploppings rock!!! :DI don't know if anything was "designed"…but I think there are many of those opportunities for the observant. 🙂

  11. Hi Thanks for the offer of Parsley. I may well co-opt her services if I
    have more snake dreams, although I'm sure Ana-Sofia Vargas would
    happily annoy the snake into submission. Wind would just ignore the
    snake elegantly until it felt bad about itself and left.I also want to tell you about Online Pharmacy its a perfect place to get your medications

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