Literature Showdown: James Joyce vs Spam

One of the following selections is literature.  The other is just a collection of nonsense phrases attached to a spam e-mail to help it escape detection filters.  Which is which? No cheating, and please, no wagering.

SELECTION A:

Jingle jingle jaunted jingling.
Coin rang. Clock clacked.
Avowal. Sonnez. I could. Rebound of garter. Not leave thee. Smack. La cloche! Thigh smack. Avowal. Warm. Sweetheart, goodbye!
Jingle. Bloo.
Boomed crashing chords. When love absorbs. War! War! The tympanum.
A sail! A veil awave upon the waves.
Lost. Throstle fluted. All is lost now.
Horn. Hawhorn.
When first he saw. Alas!
Full tup. Full throb.
Warbling. Ah, lure! Alluring.
Martha! Come!
Clapclop. Clipclap. Clappyclap.
Goodgod henev erheard inall.

SELECTION 2:

Only side does small want them side why like.
Many first ways father same without once was an take.
today find men learn may place here few.
Through thought before want whole.
Little let things small did back because across.

Last that near this against people.
May want here day can want these life those head.
Kind light last we them line me.
After he many school help miles.
Thought side water off hear learn parts should has.
Several feet far head never we which help me.

ANSWERS:

(A is from "Ulysses," by James Joyce.  B is from "Enlarge Your Penis in One Week (As Seen on TV)," by Ardene)

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6 Responses to “Literature Showdown: James Joyce vs Spam”

  1. LOL!Well I seriously was going to guess "A" as the actual literature, but I scrolled to far and saw the answer anyway! Ya gotta love those "enlarge your penis" novellas. I got one last week that said "make your woman dream there is a nine inch tool in her every night"Sounded extremely painful to me!

  2. one would think the spam purveyors should just give up their efforts and go straight to Joyce from now on

  3. I hope not. I want the job! "Write garbled non sequitars to help our e-mails slip through spam filters." I write garbled non sequitars for fun now. Of course, they probably just pay in product.

  4. I can imagine! A "nine inch tool" sounds like a crescent wrench or chisel. 😦

  5. i guessed right! hehehe… i wonder how much those email spam writers make… hehe. by the # of spam emails in my spam folder, i'm guessing they must pay pretty well. hehe.

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